This morning as I reflected on my Bible reading, I found two keys to helping us to forgive when it is so hard, when someone has hurt us or when it seems that we they have misused our trust. A friend, a sister, a co-worker, a boss, a child, whoever it is... it is sometimes so hard to forgive. But God gives us examples and keys to help us through it, because as Pastor Dick Shrekhise once helped to show me, holding a grudge is like holding a bowling ball over your head. You are hurting yourself more than the other person. There is no reason you can't put it down. Let these keys help us.
The Myth of Deserving
17 'Can a mortal be more righteous than God?
Can a man be more pure than his Maker?
18 If God places no trust in his servants,
if he charges his angels with error,
19 how much more those who live in houses of clay,
whose foundations are in the dust,
who are crushed more readily than a moth!
20 Between dawn and dusk they are broken to pieces;
unnoticed, they perish forever.
21 Are not the cords of their tent pulled up,
so that they die without wisdom? (Job 4:17-21)
One thing that I had heard before but learned more while in Brazil with my irmaos in the Igreja da Irmandade was that 'we are not deservers,' or as they say 'nao somos merecedores.' We aren't saved because we deserve it. We don't deserve it. We are fooled by our status, but the humanity surrounding us every day that we deserve fair treatment, shelter, food, water, everything. But, we really don't. God is deserving. We are all unworthy. When we remember that, we understand that we all need forgiveness. That none of us are perfect.
These lines are my favorites from this part of Job's poem. Can a mortal be more righteous than God? NO. Can a man be more pure than his Maker? Again, the answer is NO. That includes us! None of us our deserving... none of us are perfect or pure. It helps us remember that at times we too need forgiveness, at times when we don't deserve it. And Job goes further, if Angels err, how much more do we? And we die without wisdom... we do not become perfect as we age.
I have to say that this is something I believe deeply. I believe that our imperfection and incapability serve to remind us of God's grace and lead us back to Him, recognizing his perfection and capability. And in terms of forgiveness, it leads us to see how we have needed forgiveness, just like our brothers/sisters. It's one difference between my theology and that of some other denominations who believe in the possibility of eternal sanctification here on earth. Perhaps that's possible for some. But I must admit that I haven't reached it... and I like the idea of a God who is holy... there is only one who is holy... and I praise the Lord for His grace and holiness and perfection in the face of the fact that, "there is none right, not one who understands, there is none who sees God." (Romans) We're all equally unrighteous... and all equally in need of love, forgiveness and grace. We are not deserve-ers.
The Smallness of Sin
54When they heard this, they were furious and gnashed their teeth at him. 55But Stephen, full of the Holy Spirit, looked up to heaven and saw the glory of God, and Jesus standing at the right hand of God. 56"Look," he said, "I see heaven open and the Son of Man standing at the right hand of God."
57At this they covered their ears and, yelling at the top of their voices, they all rushed at him, 58dragged him out of the city and began to stone him. Meanwhile, the witnesses laid their clothes at the feet of a young man named Saul.
59While they were stoning him, Stephen prayed, "Lord Jesus, receive my spirit." 60Then he fell on his knees and cried out, "Lord, do not hold this sin against them." When he had said this, he fell asleep. (Acts 7:54-60)
Sometimes it's amazing how apt we are at making a 'mountain' out of a molehill. A tiny little detail can become huge. I'm reminded of my dear friend Carol who told me that she only remembered the things that went wrong in her wedding, while I couldn't remember a single thing that went wrong! To me, the day seemed perfect and beautiful and wonderful and amazing. The same way with disputes, arguments or what-have-you... in the whole grand scheme of things, what does it matter? But we let it get so big. It may help to reconsider the smallness of sin.
Think of Stephen for example. The people were stoning him, killing him for telling the truth! Now, there's no bigger deal than that. But, Stephen while being killed, while dying, took the effort to forgive the perpetrators, to plea for God on their behalf. If Stephen forgave those who were inflicting bodily harm on him, we must pray to God for the power and grace to forgive those who inflict lesser harm on us. Take another look at the big picture and consider what's a big deal or not.
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