The Bible Study at our home has been going through Song of Songs, and it has struck me that although not commonly thought of as such, it is a book on discipleship. I know this may sound kind of far-fetched, but stick with me on this one. It has commonly been seen as an allegory representing Jesus and the church, His bride. Perhaps in this way, we can learn, as the 80's song says, "what's love got to do with it?" "It" being discipleship.
Now this passage is often referred to as a classic depiction of discipleship. We must surrender all to follow Christ, even our family, even our own life. Yet, it interestingly enough bares a resemblance to the following verse from Genesis on the relationship between man and woman.
23 The man said,
“This is now bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called ‘woman,’
for she was taken out of man.”
24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. ~Genesis 2:23-24
Many are familiar with this verse as "leaving and cleaving", at least that's how it was referred to in my premarital counseling book. And while I thought it made sense and wouldn't be so hard for us as we live so far away, it turned out to be far more important than I had imagined. Before getting married, Brad and I had made few decisions together, but one that we had made involved our name changes. We decided to both take 2 names. When a week after our wedding, Brad was changing his mind, due mostly to his parents' disapproval, I felt that he was not leaving or cleaving. Even though we were miles away from his parents, I felt that he did not recognize that we were married... that we needed to cleave to each other and our decisions. Now, I bring this up not to bring up hurt feelings. In fact, I feel glad that we have grown in our relationship and especially in terms of leaving and cleaving to one another. But I bring it up, because I see in this instance a powerful portrayal of what we too often due to our Savior, our groom.
As Christians, we pledge to be Jesus' bride. We give ourselves over to unite with Him, loving Him so much more than "father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters" that it could seem we hate them at times. (We may do something of which they greatly disapprove in order to faithfully follow Christ.) I now know firsthand the very deep hurt caused when feeling that your love is cleaving to others before you. But this serves me to understand the hurt and sorrow we must cause our groom (Christ) when we fail to follow Him and place Him before all other things in our hearts, our homes, our lives, our every day.
Now, you might be asking, how does this relate to Song of Songs? In the literal sense, there are many points when the young woman is seeking her groom.
All night long on my bed
I looked for the one my heart loves;
I looked for him but did not find him.
I will get up now and go about the city,
through its streets and squares;
I will search for the one my heart loves.
So I looked for him and did not find him. ~Song of Songs 3:1-2
This kind of refrain is repeated several times until the 6th chapter where her friends ask her if she knows where her lover is, and she responds confidently that she knows.
Friends
Where has your lover gone,
most beautiful of women?
Which way did your lover turn
that we may look for him with you?
Beloved
My lover has gone down to his garden,
to the beds of spices,
to browse in the gardens
and to gather lilies.
I am my lover's and my lover is mine;
he browses among the lilies." ~Song of Songs 6:1-2
In the allegorical sense we may see Song of Songs as more of an inner spiritual journey. Though our groom (Christ) searches for us and proclaims His love for us in so many ways (blessings, miracles, gifts, family, guidance), oftentimes we 'seek' for him with only a part of our heart. We may feel distressed... where is my God? Where is He? We feel as if we are looking, but we are worried about other things in our life; we do not wholly give ourselves over to Christ. Only when we leave our own lives and cleave to Christ only can we feel the abundant love and joy in our unity with Him. We might rephrase Song of Songs verse 2, "I am my Lord's and my Lord is mine" based on our allegorical understanding of the text. Yet, the beauty of an allegory is that it strengthens both images... both the beauty and love which comes from a strong commitment between husband and wife as well as the beauty of the love which comes from a strong commitment between Christ and ourselves.
We never really think about a baptism as a marriage ceremony. But in a way, it bears a resemblance. When we accept Christ into our hearts, we fully commit our lives to Christ and Christ alone.
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