Friday, October 31, 2008

"I Am Weak!"

Humility
Jeremiah 47:1-48:47

"We have heard that the people of Moab are proud, very proud. They are proud, very proud, and in their hearts they think they are important." (Jeremiah 48:29)

Oooh, the harsh gossip about those people of Moab- those proud, very proud people. Nowadays, the gossip might go something like this, "She really thinks she's something special" or "He's so stuck up." However you put it, pride (though prevalent in our culture) is still not a characteristic we aspire to embody. This is certainly an idea emphasized by the influence of pietism in the Church of the Brethren. My father would often hesitate to say, "I'm so proud of you," noting that pride is not an admirable trait. Rather "if I must boast, I will boast in the things that show my weakness." (2 Corinthians 11:30) Thank you, God, for using my weaknesses to show your power, for it is only through You that I can do all things.

Need
Psalm 119:113-120

"Help me, and I will be saved. I will always respect your demands." (Psalm 119:117)

Another familiar Psalm puts it this way: "I lift my eyes up to the hills- where does my help come from?" (Psalm 121:1) Or as the Beatles might sing... "All you need is God... dum da dumdadum." I think sometimes I'm guilty of forgetting how completely dependent I am upon God, how desparately I need the Lord in every aspect of my life. First, I would have no hope of saving myself from my sin without the Lord's saving grace. And furthermore, I would not be able to feel this abundant joy. Lord, may I always live mindful of my dependency on Your saving grace.

Strength
2 Timothy 4:9-22

"But the Lord stayed with me and gave me strength..." (2 Timothy 4:17)

Anorexia is an issue surrounded by deep layers of shame to say the least. Personally, I reached a point where after seeking to control everything so completely, I felt utterly helpless... and I thank God every day that with the help of family and friends I turned back to Him. Without You, oh Lord, I don't even know if I would be here.

The craziest thing is that while I was torturing myself by literally "running on empty" (many many miles a day), I would pray "May I walk and not grow weary, run and not faint." Fainting was something that happened more and more frequently the more severely I "limited my food intake." Yet somehow, I feel that this small way of reaching out to God kept me within God's reach... helped me to remember that God is so much stronger than an eating disorder.

Though I sometimes slip back into old habits, I'm stronger now... only through the strength that God has given me. Lord, I cannot even put into words my gratitude for staying with me. You stayed with me an gave me strength when I turned to you, crying for help.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Thy Word

Emmanuel
Jeremiah 45:1-46:28

"'People of Jacob, my servants, do not be afraid, because I am with you,' says the Lord..." (Jeremiah 46:28)

Sometimes I wish God would still send messages ("This is what the Lord God says...") through someone. But even better than those messages is the beautiful message of Emmanuel- God with us. When we believe God's word, we carry that message within us. And I am a firm believer that God is still speaking today... perhaps we just don't take time in the quiet to listen. This morning I noticed a beautiful cactus by the Old Main building that resembles an angel. I wonder whether it is God, reminding me of His loving, guiding presence in my life.

Light of the World
Psalm 119:105-112

"Thy word is like a lamp unto my feet and a light for my path." (Psalm 119:105)

A Story: One of my first experiences with GCF was a retreat at a cabin quite removed from campus. We walked down the dirt path toward the cabin, and it soon fell dark. The newbies among us had no clue where we would find this place, yet the flashlights (when people agreed to use them) illuminated the trail... just enough to see a few steps in front of us. We had faith that one step at a time we would reach the others at the retreat.

Lord, may I have faith to know that your word leads me step by step. I don't need to know all of your plan for my life right now. I only need to read your word day by day and follow your path for my life step by step.

Word
2 Timothy 3:1-4:8

"All Scripture is inspired by God, and is useful for teaching... Using the Scriptures, the person who serves God will be capable, having all that is needed to do every good work." (2 Timothy 3:16-17)

This first scripture is very well-known and often quoted. While I agree that it is very important, I believe the second (often neglected) verse is just as important. If our aim is to serve God, reading the words is not enough. We must reflect on the messages, the commands, the guidance therein and use them "for the glory of God and my neighbor's good" (Sauer Press).

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Amazing Grace

Defying Pride
Jeremiah 43:1-44:30

"Even to this day the people of Judah are still too proud. They have not learned to respect me or to follow my teachings. They have not obeyed the laws I gave you and your ancestors." (Jeremiah 44:10)

Oh those people of Judah. There they go again- worshiping and making offerings to some goddess. And we are told that they are too "proud" to respect and follow God. Reflecting on the Lord's awesome glory, I don't know how you can be "proud". Personally compared to God's goodness, holiness, mercy and perfection... I feel anything but proud, completely undeserving is more like it. Lord, blessed be Your name and Your miraculous unfathomable grace that You've granted an undeserving poor sinner such as myself.

Sweet Promises
Psalm 119:97-104

"Your promises are sweet to me, sweeter than honey in my mouth!" (Psalm 119:103)

The many references to food in the Bible and the specific reference to Jesus as the bread of life (as we studied last night in Bible Study) seem to give this verse special meaning. While we enjoy honey (energy-giving and sweet), it is the Lord and His abundant life-giving promises that give our life true joy and sweetness. What are these promises? Eternal life, life in abundance, joy, among many others. I need only look at a few passages to uncover enough 'sweet' miracles to develop a toothache!

Made Holy
2 Timothy 2:1-26

"In a large house there are not only things made of gold and silver, but also things made of wood and clay. Some things are used for special purposes, and others are made for ordinary jobs. All who make themselves clean from evil will be used for special purposes. They will be made holy, useful to the master, ready to do any good work." (2 Timothy 2:20-21)

I love these verses so much, as I seek to be of use to my heavenly Father. One of God's sweet promises is right here in this verse! If I live a pure life, God will make me holy and useful! I may not be made of gold or silver (made to run a non-profit organization or save peoples lives as an ER doctor), but even wood and clay are useful. God can use this broken clay bowl for "ordinary jobs," for "any good work." So, here I am, Lord... use me for whatever good work You choose. Be it helping a handicapped woman put her shoe on or offering someone something from the farmer's market. May my holiness and usefulness be ever glorifying to Your amazing grace!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Enough

Mine
Jeremiah 39:1-40:16

"But Nebuzaradan, commander of the guard, left some of the poorest people of Judah behind. They owned nothing, but that day he gave them vineyards and fields." (Jeremiah 39:10)

"The last shall be first" idea is common throughout the Bible, and sometimes I really wish we could somehow reinstate the year of Jubilee. It's both disheartening and hopeful to think that we live in a world that can afford everyone's needs but not everyone's wants. There is enough food, enough land for what we all need. How long, O Lord, until we get it right? This verse also makes me question what was happening here. How many of these people simply didn't have the right to own land? How many of these people had their own land taken from them from the government? (It reminds me of many land right struggles in Guatemala.) And yet, we should always all remember that our paychecks, our homes, right down to our shoes... all we have is simple "on loan" to us, precious gifts from God to be shared with our brothers and sisters.

Hope
Psalm 119:81-88

"I am weak from waiting for you to save me, but I hope in your word." (Psalm 119:81)

Hope is no longer used in the sense of complete trust and faith- to hope in something or someone to save and help you. Yet to me it is a beautiful phrase- it seems to combine both physical (waiting) and spiritual (trusting) aspects of the sentiment. When I was in Brazil, I was paid in US dollars. We're all familiar with the state of our economy, and this means that by the time I left Brazil, I was earning 1/3 of what I had been earning at the beginning. Yet, this led me to hope in God, in my community who loved and supported me... generously giving me more than I needed and certainly more than I deserved.

Needs
1 Timothy 6:3-21

"We brought nothing into the world, so we can take nothing out. But, if we have food and clothes, we will be satisfied with that." (1 Timothy 6:7-8)

From a very early age, I remember startling my friends by asking, "Do you need it? Or do you want it?" This was the question I learned from my parents which taught me that my needs are relatively few (and all satisfied)... and this diminished the importance and quantity of my wants. How difficult to live in a world with a philosophy of "more, more, more" and where children aren't taught to grow up and live conscious of the fact that we are blessed to have more than what we need (food, clothes, shelther)... and even this, we will leave behind.

Monday, October 27, 2008

Gifts- To Be of Use

Excerpt from "To Be of Use" (See entire poem by Marge Piercy)

Hopi vases that held corn, are put in museums
but you know they were made to be used.
The pitcher cries for water to carry
and a person for work that is real.

The Gift of Prayer
Jeremiah 41:1-42:22

"Then Jeremiah the prophet answered, 'I understand what you want me to do. I will pray to the Lord your God as you have asked. I will tell you everything he says and not hide anything from you.'" (Jeremiah 42:5)

The gift of prayer reminds me of a story I heard in a sermon once... let us digress...

There were four men (one of them the pastor) on a road trip somewhere, and they stopped at a diner that was advertising a special on chocolate chip pancakes. The place was packed with hungry travelers and a waitress that was a bit more than flustered hurriedly took their order. After delivering their pancakes, the four men bowed their heads to pray as the waitress started to walk away. The woman turned on her heels, put her hand on her hip and said, "If you're looking for the chocolate chips, they're all on the bottom!"

How unfortunate that prayer- our blessed opportunity for connecting to God- has become such a rarity that it may not even be recognized around the dinner table. While I believe that everyone desperately needs prayer, I recognize that some people have a special gift for expressing their prayers in words. Personally, I tend to pray more with my heart... recognizing that God knows how to fix my imperfect words, thoughts, hopes and desires.

The Gift of Obedience
Psalm 119:89-96

"I will never forget your orders, because you have given me life by them." (Psalm 119:93)

Trust and obey- like the Racabite family. Seems so difficult in this day in age for two reasons that I can think of presently. First of all, we're in an era that encourages questioning authority. Bad? I don't know... because secondly, some of that authority is corrupt and has lost our trust. But it's important to remember that God's orders, God's ways, God's laws are so different. A law that comes from life and love is trustworthy and perfect and not of this world. So, help me to treat your way differently God, and always obey Your voice.

The Unique Gifts We Are Called to Use
2 Timothy 1:1-18

"Keep using the gift God gave you... Let it grow, as a small flame grows into a fire." (2 Timothy 1:6)

In his book, The Irresistible Revolution, Shane Claiborne mentions message therapists "who spend days massaging the tired feet of homeless folks" and manicurists "who go to old folks homes and ask which ladies have no visitors or family, and then they sit with them, laugh, tell stories, and do their nails" (137). How beautiful when we see brothers and sisters in Christ taking care of one another, and I can only think to ask... what is my special gift that God has given me?

It reminds me of the children's song:
What can I give Him poor as I am?
If I were a shepherd I would give a lamb.
If I were a wiseman, I would do my part.
Yet what I can give Him, I'll give my heart.

While I'm not quite sure what my special and unique gift is, at least I can give my heart to people and love them as you taught us, Lord. May you help me as I let my gifts grow, to be of use in your kingdom, oh God.


Sunday, October 26, 2008

True Treasure

See: The Story of Stuff (a 20 minute animation of the consumerist society)

Life
Jeremiah 37:1-38:28

"...Do not send me back to the house of Jonathan the royal secretary, or I will die there!" (Jeremiah 31:20)

Straight out of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, Jeremiah (who has lived less than a charmed life) embodies the psychological theory that if basic needs like food and water are met, then someone can go on to worry about safety (shown here), then love, then self-esteem, then self-actualization. So many people live in the first couple of stages... worrying about where they will get their next meal and if they will sleep safely until tomorrow. And like little Thalita in my Sunday School prayer group, let me always remember to thank God for the treasure of "one more day of life".

Body
Psalm 119:73-80

"You made me and formed me with your hands..." (Psalm 119:73)

Created in the image of God with an amazing human body. A few weeks ago, I fell while running 5 miles and was scratched up from head to toe... now I barely notice the scars. The healing process is just one of the many little miracles inherent in this earthly body God has created for us. Lord, please forgive me for the times when I have not appreciated this body or the fact that you created it for me as a gift- to use to your glory.

Lasting Treasure
Proverbs 27:23-27

"Riches do not go on forever..." (Psalm 27:24)

Sometimes I think that these problems with the economy aren't the worst thing for our country right now. While I am distressed at thinking of the many people losing their jobs, I pray that people will stop relying so heavily on their wallets and rely more heartily upon God. It's also hard for me to feel the pinch, since I am earning so much more than last year and have already learned the trick to economizing. Even more important, these past years have shown me the lasting blessings that do not come from dollars (or reais)... a smile shared, stories exchanged, a warm hug, a cafezinho to accompany a friendly conversation. Thank you, Lord, for this this treasure that I carry in my heart.

Purity
1 Timothy 5:1-6:2

"Think carefully before you lay your hands on anyone, and don't share in the sins of others. Keep yourself pure." (1 Timothy 5:22)

Pure- two things come to mind when I hear this word. First of all, Katherine means pure... talk about a hard name to live up to. And pure drinking water, water which gives life to all creation. In this world where so many sins are upheld as blessings (where the stock market and income are our measures of success), it's hard to remain pure- in the world but not of the world. But, I've known people who are masters at this. Kate (my namesake) and Taunt (my great-aunt) would kindly look at life from the outside, capable of noting the blessings they were a part by keeping themselves away from "the sins of others". I can still hear Taunt saying, "What a blessing" as she welcomed nine young children to run around her house to play rowdy games of hide-and-go-seek.

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Blessings

Obey
Jeremiah 35:1-36:32

"...If you obey me, you will live in the land I have given to you and your ancestors." (Jeremiah 35:15)

Just like the Recabite family, we will be blessed for our obedience. That family could not drink wine or plant vineyard or build houses but live in tents. I'm sure it wasn't always easy, like they were invited to a wedding... or when a storm came up. But, they continued. I pray that I may obey You always, Lord... so that I may some day reside in the land You have given us, Your kingdom.

Serve
Psalm 119:65-72

"You have done good things for your servant, as you have promised, Lord." (Psalm 119:65)

This reminds me of the verse, "Every good and perfect gift is from above..." (James 1:17). I have been showered with so many good and perfect gifts, so many amazing blessings- from the fresh sunrise of a new day this morning to the opportunities to travel and meet so many wonderful brothers and sisters... and so so many more. And I do not deserve this at all, but God has blessed me, as the Lord has promised. Now I want only to serve the Lord in gratitude for every good thing in my life, which is from God.

Train
1 Timothy 4:1-16

"...but train yourself to serve God. Training your body helps you in some ways, but serving God helps you in every way by bringing you blessings in this life and in the future life, too." (1 Timothy 4:7-8)

I just finished my morning run in training for my half marathon Nov. 2, so this verse holds particular meaning for me. I know what it is to seriously train- research different techniques and styles of training schedules, eat proper foods, follow the schedule every day, and put energy into each run. Similarly with training to serve God- find different ways to serve (in the community, outside), nourish your soul with the word, set apart a regular time with the Lord, and be present ("in spirit and in truth"- John 4:23) in this time with God. Anyone who's been a VSer (volunteer service worker) knows that serving is not easy... but I have been so blessed my the people I've worked with in every area of my life, and a part of them remains in my heart- a very real blessing in my future life, too.