Praise and practice

I will sing praise to Your name forever, that I may daily perform my vows. —Psalm 61:8

Praise the LORD from the earth,
you great sea creatures and all ocean depths,
lightning and hail, snow and clouds,
stormy winds that do his bidding,
you mountains and all hills,
fruit trees and all cedars,
wild animals and all cattle,
small creatures and flying birds,
kings of the earth and all nations,
you princes and all rulers on earth,
young men and maidens,
old men and children.- Psalm 148:7-12

This is an important issue for both Brad and I, as we have both felt called into some sort of ministry at some point. These first two verses seem to indicate that praise and practice go hand in hand. You can't be truly praising the Lord in an act of worship if what you are doing in your life is dishonoring to Him. The purpose of praise is to honor the Lord our God, so praising Him is directly incongruent with running from His will.

But it is comforting to know that as the first verse states, a part of completing God's will is in the everyday. Where I am right now, not in front of a congregation, I can still try to reach out to people and help people and be there when they need me. Also, the second verse talks about the winds and clouds that 'do His bidding.' They have no choice, and neither do we if we are called. Lord, I trust that You are powerful and faithful, and when You call me... I will do Your bidding, just like the seas and the winds that You also created.

Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain. - 1 Corinthians 15:58

Here again is the word 'always.' Not just when called to full-time ministry, but always. We always need to be serving our Father with whatever gifts He has graced us. While in grad school or afterwards. And it is so wonderful to serve Him. The other day my mom asked me if GCF was too much to me, and I quickly said no. It's so important to me... it's so wonderful for me. Does it take time? Yes. Does it take energy? Yes. But it fills be with joy to in some small way be able to serve my Lord and Savior. He is faithful. He gives me the love and energy and guidance that I need. And this work is not in vain.

Christians in Academics

I am persuaded that [nothing] shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. —Romans 8:38-39

Last night at GCF a panel of Christian faculty from the U of A graced us with their presence. They talked about the challenges and blessings of being a Christian in the academic setting. Some grad students really struggle with how to express their faith in their courses and their teaching... they fear judgment and rejection from a society that views this talk as 'crazy' and 'nonsensical' and 'unfounded.'

Luckily I don't confront too much of that in my setting... or perhaps I just don't care enough about what my professors care about that. But, the humanities seem to be an interesting area, though. You won't be attacked by your beliefs, because there is this broad sense of 'spiritual relativism,' that 'you're ok, I'm ok' philosophy that what works for you is good and what works for me is good. While there is tremendous respect for other's beliefs (a definite plus), people seldom feel challenged by the fact that I may hold other values and beliefs... which makes it hard to be a witness.

Even more confusing to people is that I don't fall into a nice category in their head. I'm a political liberal. I remember one comment last night was again about 'those liberals' that don't understand 'conservative Christians.' Why can't you be Christian and politically liberal... Jesus was one of the most radical activists that ever roamed the earth? He cared for and associated with the broadest range of people. I really appreciated (and still do!) my Juniata Spanish professor Henry, because in him I saw a faithful and involved Christian who was thoughtful in his consideration of scripture but also as far as political action. In fact, I've seen that a lot throughout my years. Perhaps that's why this isn't such a struggle for me. I know that academics and scripture combine quite well... even though it's not a common combination. Nothing, not even the pressure or judgment of those in the academic field can separate us from Him.

The LORD watches over the alien and sustains the fatherless and the widow, but he frustrates the ways of the wicked. -Psalm 146:8

It's not fun to be considered the alien, the foreigner. I know firsthand the challenges that come along with being so removed from home, sometimes feeling so alone. And sometimes it doesn't even need to be another country. This morning I consider this scripture as I think back to my first year here in Tucson- just last year. There were times when I thought I wasn't going to make it. I felt like no one was reaching out to me... I felt so alone. I learned that building community and friendships takes time, but remembering that experience has made me want to reach out to all of the new first years here in the U of A grad school. I remember how I was hit all at once with the pressures of grad school and a new place that I hardly knew anything about and I had no developed support system to vent to. Lord, just as you watch over those who are far from home, help me to do the same... guide me and let your love work through me.

For I am the least of the apostles and do not even deserve to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God. But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them—yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me. - 1 Corinthians 15: 9-10

Part of this is trying to work with GCF, and I am now in the position of a Bible study leader. I'm hoping that God may help me to call out other leaders within our group so that we may reach out to others. And I'm so blessed by the wonderful Bible Study group that I have... because I was quite nervous at leading a 'grad student' crowd who is trained to be critical and analytical and competitive. But there is such a wonderful spirit of kindness and warmth and love and respect in the group... that I just know we'll be able to talk about divergent beliefs and opinions and thoughts without coming into conflict... that is one of the lessons of Romans after all!

So just like Paul, I feel that I am so small, and it is only God's grace that is allowing me to lead this. Lord, may Your grace work in me. Let me become small so that You can show how big You are... take this bible study into Your hands, Lord... may it be a blessing to all the graduate students... may it be used for Your glory and honor and may Your work be done through it.

God's Handiwork- Rain, Mornings, and Brethren

The heavens declare the glory of God; and the firmament shows His handiwork. —Psalm 19:1

Last night it rained. Now, that might not seem to be big news, but remember... I'm in the desert. When you're in the desert, a much needed rain is like a breath of fresh air, the changing of the leaves, the first fresh fallen snow... it's that sigh of relief that the earth and all of us give together. It's cooling and refreshing to the scorched land. And it is so beautiful. The smell, the breeze, the sky and the way it comes from the mountains. I love to look up at the storm rolling in over the mountains- with the thunder and the lightening- who could deny that His handiwork is amazing!

The beauty of the mountains and the skies and the plants that are now blooming in many brilliant colors point to God's beautiful creative paintbrush. God is so artistic, and I'm so excited that I might go camping this weekend and get to take in so much of it. I can marvel at nature's beauty and my Father's talented hand.

Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul. -Psalm 143:8

God is faithful to me every morning, every morning that I meet with Him. I love starting the day with my quiet time and reflections, my reading and prayer. When I start the day this way, I have a path. I lift up my soul to him, and He shows me a direction for the way I should go. Though I'm not quite sure about the whole of my life and where he is leading me, He shows me the way I should go... day by day. Thank You for the morning, Lord... and the direction You give me every morning.

When you come together, everyone has a hymn, or a word of instruction, a revelation, a tongue or an interpretation. All of these must be done for the strengthening of the church. -1 Corinthians 14:26

But God's creativity doesn't just show up in the beauty of the earth, it's also in the beauty of the people he has created... and the beauty of the way that they work together for his good. I can't help but think of my bible study group. God has surrounded me with so many wonderful, talented, and amazing Christians. We have musicians and teachers and cooks and bakers and encouragers and welcoming people and thoughtful people! Just within our group, I can see the amazing nature of how each one can come together and strengthen the church. Every part of our bible study strengthens it, with a word of instruction, interpretation, hymn. Thank You, Lord, for each and every one... may it all be to Your glory.

It All Turns Out

I want you to know, brethren, that the things which happened to me have actually turned out for the furtherance of the gospel. —Philippians 1:12

Paul, what a character. Much can be said about Paul... but you have to admire his courage, boldness and absolute faith in God's leading and purpose in his life. Even in the prison, he knew that things were turning out according to God's plan. Lord, I pray that I may be able to have as much faith- knowing that You can and will use me wherever I am.

It's amazing, because I have seen it. I've lived the life of a 'wanderer.' God has sent me to Millville, NJ to Boston, MA to SP, Brazil to Lancaster, PA to Tucson, AZ. And in each place, I have been able to proclaim the beauty of the joy with which God fills my life. He is the amazing blessing that I can't help but share. And God uses me. Thank You, Father, for using me. Help me to be always faithful to You.

When my spirit grows faint within me, it is you who knows my way. -Psalm 142:3

Lord, this verse speaks to me today. I am thinking a lot about my decisions for next year. PhD? A job? Seminary? Where would you have me? What would you have me do. I thank You for the blessing that I can trust You so fully. You know my way.

In more than one way, my soul grows faint. I am also worried about the bible study. How will it work out? Am I meant to be here in charge of this? Can I do a good enough job at working through Your word? But, Lord, You have placed me here. I need faith that I am where I need to be, that You know my way.

Follow the way of love and eagerly desire spiritual gifts, especially the gift of prophecy. -1 Corinthians 14:1

I'm thinking of my brother and worried about what he will do and where he will go next. But I pray that You would guide Him in the way of love. Doing such, he can't go wrong. And reveal to him, his spiritual gifts... as you reveal them to all of us.

I'll Be There...

[God] Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” —Hebrews 13:5

Being alone is a frightening thing. Having moved 8 times within the past 4 years, I know how it feels to be once again in a place where you know no one... to once again feel very alone. And despite being quite familiar with this feeling, I never grow accustomed to it. It's scary and uncomfortable, feeling so isolated. There are few people that will ever honestly make the promise to us not to leave us... when we make a poor decision, when we become anxious or worried, when we are on our worst behavior. But God makes this promise, and He is so faithful. He won't leave me... even when I've been the worst to Him. I will never be alone.

This verse is particularly important to me this morning, because I am leading a Romans Bible Study on my own... for grad students. I've led studies before, but for people that I know in the church... and we're so used to studying the Bible that it practically happens on its own. People share openly and ask their own questions and take note of things that they see in a particular passage. Now, I have to admit I feel quite intimidated and nervous, and yes... I feel alone in this endeavor. Lord, help me to know, help me to feel and help me to remember that You are with me. You will not ever leave me, but You will be with me to lead me in this study. Guide me, Father. Alone I cannot.... but alone I am not.

The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me;
your love, O LORD, endures forever—
do not abandon the works of your hands. - Psalm 138:8

Just before the familiar Psalm 139 with "Where can I go from your presence?," this scripture is greatly encouraging today. God has a purpose for me, and He will fulfill it. It is not a question or a mere suggestion. I am important, because God has given me importance. He wants me for a special reason, for a special job. And He will make it happen... not me. I am the work of His hands, and He loves me so much. Lord, help me to trust and give it all to You.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. - 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

I thank God for a love that is filled with His excellent love. Last night I was so anxious and upset about the study. I'm worried that I can't do a good enough job... I want it to be so meaningful for my wonderful friends- new and old. I want it to be His word shining through. I want people to feel comfortable... and I'm worried that I'm not up to the challenge, that I'm not the right person for the job... although the previous verses have convinced me otherwise. But, Brad prayed with me and read some verses with me, offering to help and encouraging me. Most importantly, he was there for me when I needed him... and he just offered to be there in love. I cannot help but think that these verses describe him today.

For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. 1 Corinthians 13:9-12

Now I know in part; then I shall know fully... Lord, please help me to accept the fact that I don't know it all, nor can I possibly know it all. You know everything, Father, and I need to trust that You will give me the words to speak.

Vertical Marathon- Endurance and Teamwork

I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. —Philippians 3:14

The comparison between the Christian journey has often been likened to that of a marathon, and I'll get to test that metaphor out this January! I'll be running with some great friends, and that'll be so much better than running on your own, which can sometimes be lonely and tiresome. In fact, that's what I'm looking forward to most. Although we sometimes forget, we have 'running buddies' in the race of our faith as well. We're here to encourage each other and help one another along the way. We're there for each other when someone 'hits the wall' or is 'in the zone' or anything in between.

And while there are similarities... dedication, endurance, strength, discipline and persistence to name a few... there are also differences. One stood out to me as I read this text this morning. "The upward call." Well, I've never been invited by officials to a race, but I'm sure there are some professional runners. And the best, most prestigious, most holy coach in the world has called us to this race that we run. God! In a different kind of race that leads not to gift certificates or sportware but to grace and salvation. Now that's the kind of prize worth running for! Up, up, and away!

Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good.
His love endures forever.
Give thanks to the God of gods.
His love endures forever.
Give thanks to the Lord of lords:
His love endures forever.
to him who alone does great wonders,
His love endures forever.
who by his understanding made the heavens,
His love endures forever. - Psalm 135:1-5

All runners know about endurance, the key element in any long-distance race. Wordreference.com defines 'endurance' as "the power to withstand hardship or stress." I like this definition for two reasons. First of all, it says 'withstand,' not love or enjoy or easily deal with, but withstand. And then, it mentions stress... every student knows the stress of mounting piles of reading, papers that need to be written, and classes that need to be attended. It reminds me that I need to pray for endurance, and God will help me to get through everything... just as I have before.

And "God's love endures forever." God's love is always there... though I know that I've put Him through hardships... I have hurt the beautiful temple He has given to me on this earth... I have forgotten him... and so many other things, but God's love withstands those hardships, that stress that I have put on our relationship. Thank You, Lord, for loving me no matter what... for a love that holds on when I'm not enough and need all of Your perfect love and grace to save me.

Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good. To one there is given through the Spirit the message of wisdom, to another the message of knowledge by means of the same Spirit, to another faith by the same Spirit, to another gifts of healing by that one Spirit, to another miraculous powers, to another prophecy, to another distinguishing between spirits, to another speaking in different kinds of tongues, and to still another the interpretation of tongues. All these are the work of one and the same Spirit, and he gives them to each one, just as he determines. - 1 Corinthians 12:7-11

A familiar verse, and keeping with the running theme today, let's think of the track team. To one there is given the message of running form (coach), to another the message of speed (sprinters), to another the message of endurance (distance), to another the message of strength (throwers), etc. Wherever we are... whether it's the composition of a church or a job place or a Bible study, it is evident that we don't have the same gifts. In fact, even a group of teachers will teach in a different way with a different sort of emphasis.

In the church, this is a beautiful thing, because the gifts work to complement one another. That's why I love and appreciate ecumenical gatherings, actually. Some churches emphasize social involvement and service, others emphasize intense worship, others emphasize evangelism. But if we could learn to see all churches as one, as parts of the body... it would be so beautiful. Then we could see what I believe is already taking place... the work of one and the same spirit, given to each one, just as He determines.

Love Letters

God is love. —1 John 4:8

This morning, the ODB talks about wartime love letters, quite fitting because I was recently looking back at some old emails that I had sent at the beginning of my relationship with Brad, along with some emails that he has written me. And I love to read and reread those words... they are so sweet, they always bring a smile to my face. If you've ever been far from someone you love, you know that it's difficult. And during the 3 months when I was far from Brad, I looked at those notes so often... because they encouraged me and reminded me of the love that we have.

Similarly, God has given us such great love that He has taken the time to inspire so many words of love... in the Bible. We must take time to read and reflect on these beautiful love letters every day.

With lovingkindness I have drawn you,
Proving that My love is true;
Do not neglect to read of that love,
Written in My Word for you. —Verway

How good and pleasant it is
when brothers live together in unity!
It is like precious oil poured on the head,
running down on the beard,
running down on Aaron's beard,
down upon the collar of his robes.
It is as if the dew of Hermon
were falling on Mount Zion.
For there the LORD bestows his blessing,
even life forevermore. - Psalm 133:1-3

And God gives us His love in another form as well... He gives us our brothers and sisters to encourage and love us, to embody His love for us here on earth. I remember how important GCF (Graduate Christian Fellowship) was to me when I arrived here last year. When I had nothing and felt so alone, these people offered me friendship and encouragement and support and to read those beautiful love letters that God has written to us.

Another thing I appreciate about GCF and groups like it is that we do 'live together' in 'unity,' even while we have our slight different opinions or theological believes. This verse does not say that it is blessed when brothers are singleminded, but that they are together and united, working together for God's kingdom. I can't help but think that they other way might not even be quite so blessed... because it is not so challenging.