Investment: Serving with your Whole Heart

The True Shepherd

Investment: Serving with your Whole Heart

In familiar psalms and hymns like "Savior, Like a Shepherd Lead Us", we are given the beautiful image of the Lord as our shepherd. But reading through the scriptures reminds us that this is more than a lovely picture. This is a powerful metaphor for the overwhelming love that God has for us.

Jesus- Our Shepherd

For example, take the following passage. By comparing the good shepherd to the hired hand, Jesus explains his relationship with us:

¹¹ “I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep. ¹² The hired hand is not the shepherd and does not own the sheep. So when he sees the wolf coming, he abandons the sheep and runs away. Then the wolf attacks the flock and scatters it. ¹³ The man runs away because he is a hired hand and cares nothing for the sheep. (John 10:11-13)

In the field of language and identity, there is a theory called 'investment' theory by Bonny Norton (2000). Depending on how 'invested' you are in the target language (the one you're trying to learn) determines a great deal how well you learn that language and also your attitude toward that language. For example, if you are a high school student who feels forced to take French for one hour a day without any real purpose for it, you are less likely to learn it to the extent that a study abroad student in France will.

While this theory relates specifically to language, it's not only to language that the idea of investment can be applied. For example, we can see in the verses above that the hired hand is less invested in the sheep for an obvious reason... he does not own the sheep. He cares less about them, so he may run away when frightened.

But Jesus is not a hired hand. He loves and knows the sheep and will not abandon them, because they are His. What a comforting and overwhelming thought. God does not take care of us because He needs to any more than our parents love us because they need too. They just love us and care for us, because we are theirs and they are invested in us.

He will not abandon us when the wolves come, when tough times come, when the decisions come, when uncertainty comes. This is hard for me, especially when I'm in a position where I want to make a decision, but I can't just yet... usually because others aren't ready for a decision. When I can't even imagine into the future, it makes me very anxious. But I need to trust that the good shepherd will not leave me, even if I can't see Him through the fog.

Ourselves - As Under-Shepherds

Similarly, another scripture verse from the other day reminded me that we are to imitate Christ and be shepherds.

¹ To the elders among you, I appeal as a fellow elder and a witness of Christ’s sufferings who also will share in the glory to be revealed: ² Be shepherds of God’s flock that is under your care, watching over them—not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be; not pursuing dishonest gain, but eager to serve; ³ not lording it over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock. ⁴ And when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the crown of glory that will never fade away.

⁵ In the same way, you who are younger, submit yourselves to your elders. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because,

“God opposes the proud
but shows favor to the humble.”

⁶ Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. ⁷ Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. (1 Peter 5:1-6)

I have heard 'deacons' or 'elders' in many churches referred to as "under-shepherds", and after reading this verse, it seems quite fitting. Here we are instructed on how to be a shepherd with the same motive and attitude of Christ.

It should not be done out of obligation ('because we must') or for gain or power, but it should be done because we are willing, eager to serve, and examples to the others. Humble servants of the Lord will be lifted up, given strength to serve.

Today I pray for all the new upcoming leaders of GCF. I am so thankful for their hearts of genuine service, willing and eager to serve in ministry in our Graduate Christian Fellowship. I pray for them as they pray for our new group of students this upcoming year. I pray for them as they prepare their bible studies and even hold bible studies during this summer at their homes. I pray that God would encourage them and give them peace and strength during the busy times of the semester and joy and excitement as they serve the Lord. And I pray that these young shepherds remember that they have a shepherd to turn to, to pray to... that they may cast all their cares on Jesus, because He cares for them. They are His sheep, and He will not abandon them... when the wolves (or midterms or finals) come.

Destroying the Power of Sin- Jesus Paid it All

Companionship with the Living Lord:
Destroying the Power of Sin- Jesus Paid it All

Today's passage often seems somewhat obscure upon first read... or perhaps even a second read.

¹¹ In him you were also circumcised with a circumcision not performed by human hands. Your whole self ruled by the fleshwas put off when you were circumcised by Christ, ¹² having been buried with him in baptism, in which you were also raised with him through your faith in the working of God, who raised him from the dead.

¹³ When you were dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made you alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins, ¹⁴ having canceled the charge of our legal indebtedness, which stood against us and condemned us; he has taken it away, nailing it to the cross. ¹⁵ And having disarmed the powers and authorities, he made a public spectacle of them, triumphing over them by the cross. (Colossians 2:611-15)

So I chose to also look at 'The Message' which is a re-written version without the olden terms and jargon from so long ago. It's 'the main point', the 'gist' and should be treated like that. It's important to also see and read the real translation.

^11-15Entering into this fullness is not something you figure out or achieve. It's not a matter of being circumcised or keeping a long list of laws. No, you're already in—insiders—not through some secretive initiation rite but rather through what Christ has already gone through for you, destroying the power of sin. If it's an initiation ritual you're after, you've already been through it by submitting to baptism. Going under the water was a burial of your old life; coming up out of it was a resurrection, God raising you from the dead as he did Christ. When you were stuck in your old sin-dead life, you were incapable of responding to God. God brought you alive—right along with Christ! Think of it! All sins forgiven, the slate wiped clean, that old arrest warrant canceled and nailed to Christ's cross. He stripped all the spiritual tyrants in the universe of their sham authority at the Cross and marched them naked through the streets. (The Message, Colossians 2:11-15)

What stood out to me, especially as I read the message version was the part I have highlighted above... destroying the power of sin. Well, it might just seem evident, but that's what's so striking... it wasn't evident at one point. Hmm... a little confusing perhaps, but I'll try to explain.

In critical discourse analysis, there is a 'power' is a hot topic, some might say... 'the' topic. DCA is all about how language is power-laden and its interpretation, understanding and meaning is intricately tied into society's power structure. Ok, it might still seem a little far-fetched, but stick with me here.

Whatever is unnoticed or taken as a 'given' in a certain speech community is usually there for a specific purpose, and the fact that a practice is important to be carried out in a certain matter means that it holds power. For instance, it might've been developed by a distinguished person in that society.

So, all the laws, the rites, the customs that the Jews had to carry out were not benign. I would argue that they were power-laden . (Ah, there's our key word.) The fact that these were obligatory and had crucial consequences if they were not practiced correctly. In fact, the consequences were very real and could range from chastisement to stoning. (Now that's power!)

But, that's not what they were meant for. They were not given to people for them to follow them out of fear of what these powerful laws (or the 'keeper's of the law') could do.

In fact, it seemed that these people were not capable of understanding God's law in the way that He had meant it. So, he sent a new law. God sent His son, who 'paid it all'. He destroyed the power of sin over our lives... that power that could cause our embarrassment or pain or exculsion. Instead, we are all included. In fact, "the law" is one difficulty we Christians have so so often. Our societies are structured around 'laws', so it is hard to understand this Christianity that is about love... that is not earned but freely given.

Unlike all of our earthly societies, this is a community that invites all in... none need to earn their way. There is no hierarchical structure. In fact a critical discourse analysis of the kingdom of heaven would be extremely different... God is powerful and He reigns, but He does not hold that power over us in the way that our earthly societies do.

Praise the Lord for His marvelous, amazing, and beautiful way... that is so much more wonderful than we can even completely understand. He has saved us from the power of sin, of the law, of our societies.

I Think, Therefore I Am

Companionship with the Living Lord: I Think, Therefore I Am

Today's scriptures prompt me to think about 'thoughts'. A recently popularized debate in my field is "Does language change the way we think?" For instance, does the fact that my language allows certain grammatical structures or uses certain words for things change the way I think about it. But, this morning, let's consider a more important and often forgotten concern... "Does Christianity change the way we think?" We know that it can, when we pray and ask the Holy Spirit. But do we do that? Do we allow Christ to change the way we think?

Phillipians 4:1-9 is one of my favorite scriptures, and perhaps if I thought about it each day, my day's thinking would be very different. But let's consider two distinct ways that Christ-like thinking can change our lives- in reactive and proactive situations.

Allow Christ to Change Your Thoughts

When You're Re-acting

⁴ Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! ⁵ Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. ⁶ Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Phillippians 4:1-9)

When I sang the chorus, "Rejoice in the Lord always and again I say rejoice" jubilantly in Vacation Bible School, our joyous voices had it right... but little did I know the depth of that verse in its context. After all, it is not said when considering only those blessings that God has poured out on us. No... when you are anxious, when you have petitions (things you are longing for), when you are in every situation... rejoice in the Lord! Not only those days where we feel well, not only those days when we've caught up on sleep, not only vacation days. But rejoice in the Lord.

And there is sound reason for this. When you are upset, anxious, concerned, you can get caught up in a cycle of negativity that is binding. Jesus comes to set us free from our sins, some of which hide in our negative thoughts... which are harmful to both us and others. When we are nervous or anxious about so many things (finances, job, final papers, housing, etc), it is easy to get caught up in that negative worried rut.

But if we first thank God for our struggles, for being present and listening to our prayers, and for the many blessings he has given to us (a Godly spouse, a beautiful healthy child, an opportunity to study, a scholarship), our thinking is changed by those thoughts. We are then able to see the matter with eyes of hope and accept the peace that God wants to bring into our lives.

Now, it may seem crazy to thank God for our struggles. But, for example, when deciding between several job opportunities, we could thank God for the opportunities, options and decisions He has provided to us. When we are waiting back to hear from jobs, we could thank God for the blessing of finding open positions in a difficult time. By finding the silver lining, we remind ourselves of the good and the hope that outlines each situation... especially when we keep our purpose [glorifying God and obeying Him] in our mind. Any day that we can do that, is a blessed day!

Allow Christ to Change Your Thoughts

When You're Acting

⁸ Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. ⁹ Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.

However, it isn't just when we're reacting to hard situations. Perhaps you feel okay this morning. But we can be proactive. We can decide to take some time during our devotions, during our run, during our bikeride to campus to consider things that are praiseworthy.

Do you see a cute bunny hopping along and reminding you of Spring?

Praise God for that sign of new birth!

Do you hear a child's laugh or a baby's cry?

Praise God for His providence for that family's health and well-being.

Do you see a random act of kindness performed by a stranger?

A selfless act by a group of friends?

For instance, I praise God for the beautiful gift of love given last week by our friends. Brad and I switched apartments within our complex to save a little money each month with a swamp cooler. And at 8am in the middle of Finals week, five of our friends came to help us move all of our furniture from one house to another. They didn't give of what time they had, they gave of what time they didn't have. In fact, two of those individuals went to help another friend move in the morning. What a beautiful, lovely, true, right, and pure act! Brad and I felt so loved, and our friends' kindness was a true testimony to Christ. Because they were doing what they have seen Christ do in the scriptures... and putting it into practice (v.9).

So I pray for you all this morning... that the Holy Spirit may come and change your thinking, so that you may rejoice in the Lord in every circumstance and give praise for all the lovely, pure, right and true things you see!

Companionship with the Living Lord- Assurance & Simplicity

Today's Bible reading includes a story that we oftentimes avoid- the story of Potiphar's wife, who wanted handsome Joseph to "come to bed with [her]" (v. 7). However, it is the end of the story that is so inspiring. After the shock of the misbehaving wife and her lie that Joseph tried to take advantage of her, we see how God continues to watch over and work in Joseph's life... even in prison.

When his master heard the story his wife told him, saying, “This is how your slave treated me,” he burned with anger. ²⁰ Joseph’s master took him and put him in prison, the place where the king’s prisoners were confined.

But while Joseph was there in the prison, ²¹ the LORD was with him; he showed him kindness and granted him favor in the eyes of the prison warden. ²² So the warden put Joseph in charge of all those held in the prison, and he was made responsible for all that was done there. ²³ The warden paid no attention to anything under Joseph’s care, because the LORD was with Joseph and gave him success in whatever he did. (Genesis 39:19-23)

Assurance

What I hear in this passage is great assurance. Even in prison, the most stressful, unfortunate and unpleasant situation, "the Lord was with [Joseph]" (v. 21). Joseph was given favor and special responsibilities as a caretaker of things in the prison, certainly the best of an undesirable situation.

No, it wasn't everything that Joseph had ever dreamed of... and certainly the many dreams that he began to explain were preferable to this life in a prison. And no, he wouldn't have put this stop on his 5-year-plan to success. But, God was with Joseph. And we see in this story that even in prison, "the Lord was with Joseph and gave him success in whatever he did" (v. 23).

Life likes to throw curveballs at us. Sometimes things are unexpected, sometimes uncertain, and sometimes downright unpleasant. But when we are Jesus' own children, He watches over us wherever we are... during finals, in another country, in the midst of health struggles. As Christ Tomlin says in his popular song based on scripture... "If our God is for us, who can ever stop us?" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=op4n0EF3PdU Certainly, who/what can ever stop us... that is in our desire to obey and glorify Him, which is our one purpose.

Singularity & Simplicity

And that is key. People/things can stop us from many things but not those things which are in accordance with our one purpose... to obey and glorify the Lord.

But we often forget. We often lose our singular of focus. Instead, we may be tricked into thinking that our 'purpose' is our work, our research, our studies, our own plans. But while our 'plans' may be interrupted and stopped, our true purpose... to obey and glorify the Lord... cannot be stopped. Prison stopped Joseph's plan of earning a good living in favor with his master, but his purpose to live for and in obedience to the Lord was not stopped.

It is this that we must keep clear in order to live a life singularly focused on Christ, simply living for Him and assured that He will give us 'success' in whatever we do, in so much as 'success' is defined by our ability to love, glorify, and be obedient to Christ in even undesirable circumstances.

Reflecting on the relationship between simplicity and singularity of heart, Richard Foster puts it this way:

"Our study of money leads us to one inescapable conclusion: we who follow Jesus Christ are called to a vow of simplicity. This vow is not for the dedicated few but for all. It is not an option to take or leave depending on our personal preference. All who name Christ as Lord and Savior are obliged to follow what he says, and Jesus' call to discipleship in money can be best summed up in the single word simplicity. Simplicity seeks to do justice to our Lord's many-faceted teachings about money- light and dark, giving and receiving, trust, contentment, faith.

Simplicity means unity of heart and singleness of purpose. We have only one desire: to obey Christ in all things. We have only one purpose: to glorify Christ in all things. We have only one use for money: to advance his kingdom upon the earth. Jesus declares, 'If thine eye be single thy whole body shall be full of light' (Matt., 6:22)." ~From Money, Sex and Power by Richard Foster

It may seem unrelated... the story of Joseph's imprisonment and simplicity. You may say, "He didn't choose to live a simple life... he was forced into it."

But I propose that it is connected to our view of God's providence. If we [falsely, I would argue] believe that God is only giving us 'success' and watching over us when we are 'rolling in the dough', living our dreams and our plans, I believe we are mistaken.

Instead, what Richard Foster offers us in his view of simplicity is that simplicity is singularity. It is easy to get caught up in the worries of... Will I be able to get a job? Will I be able to get my dream job? What if we are on one salary? What will happen next year, or the year after that, or the year after that?

But when we view our lives with a single purpose, a singular focus, a single eye, we can rest in the assurance that no matter where I am, no matter what job I take, no matter what I do, I am God's child. I will live a life that gives glory to God and obey Christ in all things... even in a smaller apartment, even in an un-ideal work situation, even out of work... and even in prison.

If our God is for us, then who can ever stop us... from fulfilling our purpose every day?

Back to Journalling- Between the Written Word & the Heart

At the end of a long semester, I appreciate taking some time to refocus, to recenter.

This year I've been invited to do different things with my devotional time, which has been nice. Brad and I began to have our devotional time together in the morning, reading and praying together before we started the day. But now, as we embark on our adventurous summers, I return to my journalling, and not just because we will be apart. I also have missed it. I find it healing, inspiring and calming to write and process so many thoughts that are a part of my days. And somewhere between or within the written words and my heart, I feel a deep connection with God.

And so, I come back to journalling, which was where my story with Christ began. When my pastor Ken gave a series called "Providence 101", in the segment about spiritual growth, he mentioned the practice of journalling. Perhaps strangely enough, this middle school aged girl was inspired and excited about this idea. "I journal already, and I really enjoy it. How much more wonderful to connect my daily Bible reading with my journalling!" And from that moment, I spent time journalling about my daily Bible readings. I was hooked.

In fact, one summer afternoon as I read the segment on Mary and the alabaster jar during a devotional journalling session, tears filled my eyes. I was filled with the same love for Jesus who I had come to know so well in writing and reading and praying to Him. I wanted to pour the alabaster jar, to give all that I had to Jesus. I ran over to my parents' room and asked them in an anxious tone, tears still in my eyes, "Why can't I be baptized?" I don't know why I put it that way. I think I just knew deep down inside that was what I wanted. My heart had already decided to put my Lord in Jesus' hands and give it all to Him. And I wanted to participate in a sign, just like Mary, to show just that. My parents answered, of course, that I could be baptized. And I affirmed that was what I wanted.

Yes, journalling and me... we go way back.

Getting Ready to Serve = "Get Down"

Lavishly our lives are wasted
Humbleness is left untasted
You can't live your life to please yourself , yeah

That's a tip from my mistakes
Exactly what it doesn't take
To win you've got to come in last place
To live your life you've got to lose it

And all the losers get a crown

CHORUS:
I get down and He lifts me up
I get down and He lifts me up
I get down and He lifts me up
I get down

I've always enjoyed this song by Audio Adrenaline. It's an oldy but goody in my book, and not just because of the upbeat tempo. The words have always held real meaning for me. To me it's been a very necessary reminder in this world where "humbleness is left untasted". While to "get down" at least a decade ago referred to "dancing in a very 'hip' way", Audio Adrenaline used this play on words to liken "getting down" or humbling ourselves to a very hip action.

This may seem very strange indeed... that making less of ourselves could be 'cool.' The 'cool crowd' in school and the 'prestigious' in society aren't the ones who humble themselves... but that's exactly what Jesus did. That's the example Jesus gave us. Our counter-cultural Christian cool does indeed require us to 'get down'... instead of living our lives to please ourselves and live our lives to serve others... so that God can lift us up.

¹ Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, ² then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. ³Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, ⁴ not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.

⁵ In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:

⁶ Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;
⁷ rather, he made himself nothing
by taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
⁸ And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
by becoming obedient to death—
even death on a cross!

⁹ Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name,
¹⁰ that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
¹¹ and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father. ~ Phillipians 2:1-11

We are called in this passage to be like-minded, to be imitators of Christ. Phillipians 2:3 is the verse that Brad and I chose as a guiding scripture for our marriage, and I am still glad that this is the verse we chose. As many like to say, 'marriage is not a 50-50 deal.' You give you choose to serve and love and serve with your whole self, valuing the other as more important than yourself. Who was a better example of this than Christ who gave His life for us? That is why we are called to be imitators of Christ... in terms of His service, obedience and unity to God.

Servant

⁶ Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;
⁷ rather, he made himself nothing
by taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.

When Christ came to the earth, what he deserved was fine robes, a palace, the best clothes, a life of luxury. He is Lord! But He took nothing that He 'deserved.' Instead, He was born in a stable, lived the life of a simple carpenter, went around healing and preaching to others. So many of the stories of Jesus' life involve Him serving others.

I think of how often I say, "It's not fair!" We very often feel that we are entitled to certain things. And usually, most often it's about wanting more. We should get a higher grade, a better job, a better salary, more vacation, etc. In fact, just last night I was reciting "It's not fair!" about the fact that I need to pay for a new visa to Brazil in addition to a new passport, because I changed my name.

But sometimes I find it helpful to think of all that Jesus deserved that He didn't get. He and his family were refugees. He lived with very little. He was born in a stable. He was disrespected and hated. He had every right to say, "It's not fair!" But let's think about what Jesus said instead... "Blessed are the poor in spirit.... Go, you are healed....In my Father's house, there are many rooms." Instead of worrying about what He deserved and didn't get, Jesus spent His days serving others.

Obedient

⁸ And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
by becoming obedient to death—
even death on a cross!

While serving others, Christ was also obedient... following where Christ led Him to go. It certainly wasn't easy... and that is reflected in the scriptures. We see Him calling out, "Lord, take this bitter cup from me." His whole life was one of humility. Jesus took on human form and lived a humble, simple life. He was obedient in whatever God decided for His life... even facing the cross. He knew what was coming, but He also knew that it was God's will.

Sometimes it's hard for me to be obedient to Christ's call... but mostly because I don't 'hear' it. But sometimes I wonder if that is a fair representation of things. If I clutter my life with so many things that I have no 'time' to spend hours praying and listening and opening myself to hear God. Perhaps my 'disobedience' in not opening myself up to wait and listen to the Lord stops me from being more obedient with other aspects of my life. We know it is said "whoever is faithful with little will be faithful with much." And for me, it is just that.

One of the things that I loved about worshipping with the Quakers was their appreciation for silence and listening. So often we feel a need to fill every silence. Even in our quiet times, we read, we pray, we type ;o), but do we listen? How can we expect to be obedient is we do not take the time to be still... and listen.. If we did this, I feel we would have the same reaction as Jacob in the story of Jacob's ladder: “Surely the LORD is in this place, and I was not aware of it.” (Genesis 28:16)

Unity with God

⁹ Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name,
¹⁰ that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
¹¹ and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.

In the scripture, we know that Christ was exalted for His humility and obedience to God. While we cannot (should not) expect to be exalted, we should expect is unity with God. We, being actual humans (not just human in form), will err. We will at times feel proud and act disobediently. While not capable of the perfection of Christ, we can become new. When we ask Christ into our hearts, He has the power to change our lives... to change our marriage, to change our friendships, to change our whole selves. The Holy Spirit will guide and change us and work in our lives.

And then, we will be able to live "in the highest place"! We will be a part of the Kingdom of God! We are welcomed into the family of God.

I'll end this morning with lyrics of another song... that may encourage us as we pray to God this morning, asking Him to grant us the hearts of servants and minds that are obedient to His will only...

Now I won’t deny the worst you could say about me
But I’m not defined by mistakes that I’ve made because God says of me

I am not who I was, I am being remade, I am new
I am chosen and holy and I’m dearly loved, I am new, I am new

Who I thought I was and who I thought I had to be
I had to give them both up cause neither were willing to ever believe

Too long I have lived in the shadows of shame
Believing that there was no way I could change
But the one who is making everything new doesn’t see me the way that I do
He doesn’t see me the way that I do

I am not who I was, I am being remade, I am new
Dead to the old man, I’m coming alive, I am new, I am new

Forgiven beloved, hidden in Christ
Made in the image of the Giver of Life
Righteous and holy, reborn and remade
Accepted and worthy, this is our new name
This is who we are now

The Meaning of Discipleship: Loving & Leaving

The Bible Study at our home has been going through Song of Songs, and it has struck me that although not commonly thought of as such, it is a book on discipleship. I know this may sound kind of far-fetched, but stick with me on this one. It has commonly been seen as an allegory representing Jesus and the church, His bride. Perhaps in this way, we can learn, as the 80's song says, "what's love got to do with it?" "It" being discipleship.

²⁵ Large crowds were traveling with Jesus, and turning to them he said: ²⁶ “If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple.²⁷ And whoever does not carry their cross and follow me cannot be my disciple. ~Luke 14:25-27

Now this passage is often referred to as a classic depiction of discipleship. We must surrender all to follow Christ, even our family, even our own life. Yet, it interestingly enough bares a resemblance to the following verse from Genesis on the relationship between man and woman.

²³ The man said,

“This is now bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called ‘woman,’
for she was taken out of man.”

²⁴ That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. ~Genesis 2:23-24

Many are familiar with this verse as "leaving and cleaving", at least that's how it was referred to in my premarital counseling book. And while I thought it made sense and wouldn't be so hard for us as we live so far away, it turned out to be far more important than I had imagined. Before getting married, Brad and I had made few decisions together, but one that we had made involved our name changes. We decided to both take 2 names. When a week after our wedding, Brad was changing his mind, due mostly to his parents' disapproval, I felt that he was not leaving or cleaving. Even though we were miles away from his parents, I felt that he did not recognize that we were married... that we needed to cleave to each other and our decisions. Now, I bring this up not to bring up hurt feelings. In fact, I feel glad that we have grown in our relationship and especially in terms of leaving and cleaving to one another. But I bring it up, because I see in this instance a powerful portrayal of what we too often due to our Savior, our groom.

As Christians, we pledge to be Jesus' bride. We give ourselves over to unite with Him, loving Him so much more than "father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters" that it could seem we hate them at times. (We may do something of which they greatly disapprove in order to faithfully follow Christ.) I now know firsthand the very deep hurt caused when feeling that your love is cleaving to others before you. But this serves me to understand the hurt and sorrow we must cause our groom (Christ) when we fail to follow Him and place Him before all other things in our hearts, our homes, our lives, our every day.

Now, you might be asking, how does this relate to Song of Songs? In the literal sense, there are many points when the young woman is seeking her groom.

All night long on my bed

I looked for the one my heart loves;

I looked for him but did not find him.

I will get up now and go about the city,

through its streets and squares;

I will search for the one my heart loves.

So I looked for him and did not find him. ~Song of Songs 3:1-2

This kind of refrain is repeated several times until the 6th chapter where her friends ask her if she knows where her lover is, and she responds confidently that she knows.

Friends

Where has your lover gone,

most beautiful of women?

Which way did your lover turn

that we may look for him with you?

Beloved

My lover has gone down to his garden,

to the beds of spices,

to browse in the gardens

and to gather lilies.

I am my lover's and my lover is mine;

he browses among the lilies." ~Song of Songs 6:1-2

In the allegorical sense we may see Song of Songs as more of an inner spiritual journey. Though our groom (Christ) searches for us and proclaims His love for us in so many ways (blessings, miracles, gifts, family, guidance), oftentimes we 'seek' for him with only a part of our heart. We may feel distressed... where is my God? Where is He? We feel as if we are looking, but we are worried about other things in our life; we do not wholly give ourselves over to Christ. Only when we leave our own lives and cleave to Christ only can we feel the abundant love and joy in our unity with Him. We might rephrase Song of Songs verse 2, "I am my Lord's and my Lord is mine" based on our allegorical understanding of the text. Yet, the beauty of an allegory is that it strengthens both images... both the beauty and love which comes from a strong commitment between husband and wife as well as the beauty of the love which comes from a strong commitment between Christ and ourselves.

We never really think about a baptism as a marriage ceremony. But in a way, it bears a resemblance. When we accept Christ into our hearts, we fully commit our lives to Christ and Christ alone.